Starting over

It's been 2 months and 1 week since I lost my mother. After spending the last two years as her caretaker, my life has changed drastically. Just a few weeks after my mother passed, I moved my second to oldest daughter into her dorm room. And just a few weeks before my mom passed, my ex-boyfriend moved out. As you can imagine, with the weeks leading up to her death, my house was a revolving door of hospice nurses, family members, and friends coming to say their goodbyes.

And now...silence.

And the silence is loud.

It's peaceful, and yet I find myself blasting music when I cook in the kitchen because the music becomes my company. I've embraced having all of this me time, but it wasn't until my teenage boys spent this last week with their father that I realized I was rapidly approaching the chapter of my life where taking care of my family in the way I've always known will come to an end.

What does it look like to be 45, divorced, the newly appointed matriarch of the family, and an empty-nester in the making?

It looks like repainting my bedroom set.

It looks like purchasing a new home to build new memories in and leaving the trauma of past relationships behind.

It looks like spending more time writing music.

It looks like dedicating my life to coaching and inspiring others to live their best life regardless of their circumstances.

It looks like falling in love all over again.

It looks like starting over, in the best possible ways.